Emptied of expectation. Relax. (tinyjo) wrote,
Emptied of expectation. Relax.
tinyjo

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Another extremely pleasant night out courtesy of the girls - I do like a good girly night out. Capped it off by having tea with Ruth and doing a little DDR and DJing on the TV. This is something which Alex and I do fairly frequently. You turn on the media PC and the music drive and then take it in turns to select songs using the TV remote control, trying to match as closely as possible for mood and tone. We can do it for ages and it's a fun way of just listening to music without having to add something else to absorb yourself.

I am feeling very uninspired about food and cooking at the moment - very unusual for me. I can still go through the motions and produce a dinner but I've lost my sense of adventure and also my sense of planning - I sit in front of the Tesco website and my mind is a blank. I just end up ordering whatever I ordered last week, which is mostly a lot of salad stuff. Partly it's the heat, but I don't think it's just that. Perhaps I should join white_harts friends new community and see if that gets me back into it. If it meant that I ate correspondingly less then I would just let it go and eventually I'd get back into it but in practise it just means that I snack more so it's not helping the weight either.

In fact, the mental block has spread to the whole diet and exercise thing - I just can't seem to get up any sense of enthusiasm or urgency for it at the moment. I've hardly even been cycling to work because I just can't face the breathlessness and then arriving all sweaty and yuck (although I do actually have a good excuse for tomorrow because my bike is still in town!). I hope it's just the humidity of this summer getting me down because then when it finally cools off (which surely has to happen some time), I'd be able to get the enthusiasm up for it again. Perhaps I'll have another go at buying a waterproof radio, although I don't hold out a lot of hope - even the ones I found on eBay didn't seem to have a very strong antenna so I probably wouldn't get any reception from the gym pool anyway, although the open air one in Hinksey might work.

My get up and go just seems to have got up and went this summer. I just hope it will realise it's left me behind and come back for me some time.
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